Wow. I would probably be killed for having this in my possession. Amazing. They really DO have an instruction book. This is for the generic rednecks though, it's not entirely fair to dub them 'rednecks'.. because real rednecks are the guys who work in the fields and get sunburned necks.. green, innocent and sweet little farmboys (uh huh, they do exist, I hear) and these generic rednecks just .. well there's nothing sweet about them, but they like to call themselves rednecks. (And they always add, " and I'm proud of it"(that's one of the rules!) )
I had to go into the mountains to get a requested cemetery photo from a woman who lives in a city far away, and at the gate I found some litter, 7 or 8 empty and crushed beer cans, a torn dog eared but neatly folded magazine photo of Wynona Judd marking a page in this manual that someone had left just laying on the ground.
I knew it existed, but you can't begin to imagine my excitement at actually finding one. I was thrilled. Generic Rednecks are as secretive with it and jealously protect that secret like an old woman hangs onto her handbag after she just cashes her social security check and before she walks to town to pay her utility bills.
At the risk of my life, I'm going to start leaving excerpts here for you ladies to read, so you know what you're getting into, if you're being targeted for slavery (aka wifedom) by one of them. An ounce of prevention is worth decades of agony! Read, Learn, and Listen, then RUN LIKE HELL!!!
These excerpt copies are dedicated to Jessica.
More to come...
That's hilarious. I just thought that it was some sort of demented tradition passed down from one drunk father to the next but who'dve thought they really did write a manual about it? huh
Posted by: Sarah at December 14, 2004 05:53 PM