Juel's Journal

Sometimes...

...I don't feel real. I find myself wondering if I'm just a figment of someone else's imagination, or even of my own. I sit, thinking, death isn't going to be painful. I'll just be written out. I'm not real anyway. Things that happen in my life just seem to be happening, it's not real. Some...weird author is doing this and I wish he or she would just stop!

I feel like my memories aren't even my own. Things I think happened didn't. Are they just something I read a long time ago...or maybe something someone else told me and I've incorperated them into my own cache of memories.

Did I really have 2 children? Are they truly grown already? Do I have a slew of grandchildren? Do I really babysit them? Were they actually here playing and carrying on yesterday?

Did I really get this scar on my left hand from a broken Coke bottle?

Is that really a scar on my left hand?

Did I really have 2 grandmothers of my own? Did one of them truly have an abhorrence to wearing undergarments?

Maybe I'm just someone's nightmare. A gentler Freddy Kruger, but a Kruger, nonetheless. A bad dream, alive only until the dreamer wakes.

Am I real?

Faux Mink Blanket

I put mine on the wall. Hillbillyish? Maybe, but until I can get a quilt hanger, it's safer there than on the bed where it would most likely get something spilled on it. That is the warmest thing I've ever felt. Isn't it pretty?

Dad

He's headed back to Florida this morning. I called to tell him to drive safely, it's sleeting out there. He said he'll be fine once he gets past Clinch Mountain. Since this has just started, I'm sure he'll get there before the roads get too bad.

A couple of his grandchildren didn't call him before he left.. that hurt his feelings. It hurt mine for him. Sometimes, it seems like those who have been there for those same grandchildren aren't thought about and those who haven't been are the ones who are thought so highly of. I think maybe it's time to stop being there..

*smiles slightly* Sounds like a show for Jerry Springer, doesn't it?

Anyway, enough of that. He sounded good, for someone just waking up. Maybe the time will fly and he'll be back again pretty fast.

Be safe, Dad.

The Old Corbin Hospital

I've had more email and real world comments about my section on the old Baptist Regional Medical Center than on any other part of this website.

It seems everyone likes it.

There are several who want to go with me back to the hospital, when I go try to get recordings of goings-on at the emergency room entrance. Booya!

*laughs*

The more the merrier, and that will just give the haints other folks to pick on while I'm busy running.

The thing is.. I think we're gonna need a bus to get us all there. What is it about an abandoned building that so grabs our minds and makes us want to go inside? That we're not supposed to? That it's dangerous? That maybe a ghost is going to walk right up to us there and say "Howdy"?

Hell if I know, but I feel the same way as the others. I'm DYING (not literally) to go inside that old crumbling, delapidated, asbestos riddled building. I won't. I know me. If the owner him/herself called and said, "We know the safe places to step, so come tour it.. we'll help you." - I'd still not go in there. Noway. Nuh. Nope, no thank you, I don't think so but thank you very much.

Let me reiterate. I'm a COWARD!

I'll take my pictures from safely outside if you please.. (and if you don't please!)

Oh but egads, do I ever want to go in there!

uc oh

The Bird Flu
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3946427/

Mad Cow
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3849231/

Green Onions
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2003-11-21-onions-outbreak_x.htm

Mad Pig Disease (Yes, this exists)
http://www.gene.ch/gentech/1997/8.96-5.97/msg00260.html

Eggs
http://www.cdc.gov/epo/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/mm4904a1.htm

Fruits and Vegetables can make you sick!
http://vm.cfsan.fda.gov/~dms/prodguid.html

Wash this stuff! Use plenty of..um.. er..

Water
http://forest.fireshui.com/home/cleanwater.html

Candy
http://www1.uwex.edu/news/print.cfm?release_id_pk=632&style=print_story

so...

what are we gonna do now?

Why I didn't babysit Mik and Mal today...

Sarah won't drive in this, so took today off.

Life in General

It's snowing. Cold, dark, and we're supposed to have some accumulation in the morning. It's funny, when I say that to northnah's.. they get all.. oh you don't get snow, we get 30 feet, now that's accumulation. *laughs* yeah and they can keep it, too!

I'm just wishin' time away. I wish it were spring. I have so much I want to do and can't do any of it in winter.

Bonnie's sitting here beside me, and just said, 'you look like you so want me to go away.. do you?'.. No. I'm just writing in my journal Bonnie.. Besides.. you'd not go away if I begged you to. *laughs*

Bah, hell with this, it's cold, my electric blanket is on and there's a spook movie on Sci fi.

G'nite world.